but god, i can't wait

We live in a culture of instant gratification. From 24-hour supermarkets to fast food restaurants to credit cards, our culture knows what it wants, and it wants it now. We get frustrated when we walk into a Walmart and they don't have butter, and if our order tarries longer than five minutes, we get mad and probably launch a few choice insults toward the management and staff of the McDonalds. Wherever we are, whatever we're doing, we don't want to wait.

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not be faint. - Isaiah 40:31

For thus saith the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength... - Isaiah 30:15

I chose to focus on two verses this week, mostly because I can't ever pick one favorite. But the former has been on my heart a lot lately, and in my quest for something to explain exactly what 'wait' means, I came upon the latter. I think it's a pretty good definition.

I have trouble waiting, with being patient, with sitting back and watching God work. There are times where I'm pretty good at it (and I've gotten better over the years): where I can sit by and let God take the wheel. But then, inevitably, I remember that my deadline is coming up, or I'm going to miss something important. And, like always, I try to wrest control away from God. I try to tell him that I can totally handle it way better than he can and, anyway, I know all the circumstances better than he does, so he should really just step aside before he gets hurt.

Of course, I don't phrase it that way in my head. But that's pretty much what I say.

I'm sure we all have times like that--when it seems our entire world is falling apart around our ears, and the temptation to reach out and take back our lives from God is overwhelming. I can do it, we think, and God'll still be helping me. Yeah, he won't really be driving, but...

God wants us to wait on him. When we're trying to take control from him, when we're stressing about all the little minutiae of our lives, we run out of strength. We get stretched past the point of endurance, until we're suddenly standing in the middle of a wrecked life and think, wait, how'd that happen? When things are at their worst, he wants us to turn and run back to him. He wants us to rest in him, to throw ourselves into his exorbitant, absolutely mad love and just stay. Be quiet. Have confidence.

His strength is enough for both of us.