Martha’s Table: The Danger of Service

There are so many different aspects of Christian service, but I'm going to focus on one of the most dangerous ones. If you've read my book review on Emily Freeman’s Grace for the Good Girl,  you know that many of us suffer from a try-hard way of living. I know from personal experience that this attitude can be explosive when combined with acts of service, and can potentially wreck your relationship with God.

We all start with the best of intentions.

After all, who doesn't want to help others? We’re good Christian girls, we’re supposed to be doing good works.  James did say that “faith without works is dead” (James 2:26).  But sometimes we take this concept one step further.

Feast, a photo by NorthwestNomad on Flickr.

Let’s look at Martha. Poor girl, she’s always used as a bad example, isn't she? She had great intentions: she was welcoming the Lord into her home and was preparing to lay out the best spread possible. Imagine it—Martha has brought out the best dishes, decorated the table with matching candlesticks and napkin holders, a beautiful centerpiece…and there’s Mary sitting in the corner, listening to Jesus and twiddling her thumbs. I can easily imagine Martha’s annoyance. Don’t we all bristle a bit at those people who are “so Heavenly-minded they’re no earthly good”?  But Jesus said, “Martha. Martha.”

Martha was depending on herself to feed the people. She felt personally responsible, just like we often do. 

When there’s work that needs to be done—a ministry, fundraiser, service project, etc.—who is going to do it? The good Christian girls. It’s a demonstration of our love for God, right? Sometimes, but often it’s actually an outgrowth of Martha’s self-dependent attitude. When Emily Freeman writes on this subject she uses the example of a true servant, Mary the mother of Jesus, who listened to God and trusted in Him—she didn't run off to do a great work of service. “Worship, not work, flows out of the hearts of those who believe.” 

That’s what all of this comes down to. Trust. We have to choose whether we are going to spend our lives trying to please God, or trusting Him. And we have to choose one or the other. Choosing to please God sounds great, but it can lead to a life of performance and self-reliance. It’s difficult to trust if we’re constantly performing, but how can we help pleasing God if we put our trust in Him? Do we truly believe that God loves us the same no matter how many good works we do, or do we have to perform for His acceptance?

Even service can become an idol. Jesus didn't say, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you work.” Jesus doesn't want your service, He wants you. Of course we should still serve God and others, but not out of obligation, self-righteousness, or guilt. We are accepted, we are already amazing in Christ. As Emily says, we have “permission to sit down on the inside and live like (we) have a God who knows what he’s doing.” We are free to serve out of love, and love alone. 

You have grace. Take a break from setting the table and take time to trust the Lord. Accept His invitation to rest and intimacy—to a life beyond trying hard to please Him. 

Jesus chided Martha for her “many things” (Luke 10:41). What are your many things?

- This post was inspired by chapter 5 of Grace for the Good Girl. Buy it now on Amazon.com.

Jesus Did Not Play Eeny Meeny Miny Moe

Serve. 

There’s that word again. God seems to enjoy popping it around me lately :) 

So, what exactly does biblical serving look like in our daily lives? Who should we serve?  Does serving others mean I have to wait on everyone hand and foot!?

Before we get too carried away, let’s go right to the source - Jesus’ example of serving.

Alright, ladies! Crack open those Bibles, and turn to John 13:1 - 20. Pray that God will speak to you, then take about ten minutes or so to let the words really soak in. 

In my opinion, this is one of the best examples of biblical serving. Jesus - the Almighty Holy Ruler of EVERYTHING - humbled himself and became a servant to unworthy men.  SO many aspects of serving can be gleaned from His actions, but there is one I particularly want to touch on.

When reading this with a small group at church, we noticed something we’d never seen before that gives us a little more insight as to what our attitudes in serving should be. Look at verses ten through eleven once more. 

Do you see what Jesus did? He knew who would betray him, and yet He chose to wash Judas’s feet anyway. In fact, in the following passages, ALL of his disciples end up betraying him and letting him down. Why did he still serve them? Because he wanted to show us that our service to others should be not only humble and joyful, but unbiased. 

WHOA. 

Sure, we can serve our loved ones with a happy heart, but what about that boy who always has a rude remark, or the girl who never stops complaining? Why should we serve them too?

Jesus’ dying on the cross was the greatest example of humility and service to us. He did it out of love. However, did we deserve it? Even though our enemies or those we dislike may not deserve it, Jesus shows us that we should serve others humbly and joyfully in all situations.

Does this mean we need to wait on our enemies’ every need? 

Thankfully, there is nothing in the Bible that says we must become modern-day Cinderellas. However, the Bible does say to “...Love your enemies, [and] do good to those who hate you... (Luke 6:27).” This might mean opening the door for them, or helping them with something they have to carry. Maybe it means surprising them with a hug or a kind remark when all they have to say is negative and demeaning to you. Sometimes, service is in the little things that take place behind the scenes. 

This week, I encourage you to begin serving not only your loved ones, but your...not-so-loved ones, too. Start with baby steps. Through prayer and feasting on the Word, it will become easier and easier to joyfully and humbly serve anyone. Even your enemies.

“Prayer in action is love, and love in action is service. Try to give unconditionally whatever a person needs in the moment. The point is to do something, however small, and show you care through your actions by giving your time … We are all God’s children so it is important to share His gifts. Do not worry about why problems exist in the world – just respond to people’s needs … We feel what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean, but that ocean would be less without that drop.” 

- Mother Teresa

SERVE, a photo by elycefeliz on Flickr.

Following By Example....

How can we serve others?  How do you serve others?  How does Christ want us to serve?

“But it shall not be so among you: but whosoever will be great among you, let him be your minister; And whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant: Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many”  (Matthew 20:26–28).

The life of Jesus Christ was one of complete service and surrender.  There was no task that he looked down upon, no person that he lifted his nose up at and no circumstance that He did not see as part of a bigger plan.

His example of how we as Christians are to live, was one of a true servant.  Almost everything that Jesus did was in regards to serving others.  He prayed for them, helped them, healed them, listened to them, spoke with them, encouraged them, fed them, trained them and set example that they might live by while he was on earth.

So, how are some ways we can serve others?  Here are two ideas that I think are sometimes the most important.



This photo was taken by  life is good (pete) and I found it on flikr

 1. Pray for others ~ Holding others up in prayer is one of the best ways to serve.  I think often times we use prayer as a last resort when we want to help someone, because our thoughts are always "How can I help them?".  There is nothing wrong with that thought, but there is Someone who can help far better then we can.  I know this is something that I need to really make a habit of doing and make the first question I think of "How can Christ help them?".  He can do what we can only dream of doing.

"Thus saith God the LORD, he that created the heavens, and stretched them out; he that spread forth the earth, and that which cometh out of it; he that giveth breath unto the people upon it, and spirit to them that walk therein:" ~ Isaiah 42:5

2. Pray with  them ~ I can't  tell you how many times someone has offered to sit down and pray with me and when we finished praying, whatever the situation was, I felt better about it. 
Praying with others helps:
a. The other person get their focus back on Christ
b. It helps you both to place the matter in God's hands and trust him
c. To bring a peace to both of your hearts

"For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them". ~ Matthew 18:20

I'm sure all of you have favorite ways you love to serve!  For some of you it may be making meals for those who are sick.  For some it might be babysitting for friends and family.  Others might enjoy cleaning or maybe even just spending an afternoon listening to someone share their heart. 

As I looked at some of the Commands of Christ , I realized that several of them have to do with service.

(Helping the Poor) "Then said he also to him that bade him, When thou makest a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy rich neighbors; lest they also bid thee again, and a recompence be made thee. But when thou makest a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind: and thou shalt be blessed; for they cannot recompense thee: for thou shalt be recompensed at the resurrection of the just”  (Luke 14:12–14).

(Helping Children)“Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven”  (Matthew 18:10).

(Denying Ourselves) “And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it”  (Luke 9:23–24).

(Do Unto Others) “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets”  (Matthew 7:12).

(Feed His Sheep) “So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jona, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs. He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jona, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep. He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jona, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep”   (John 21:15–17).

I would like to finish this post with a quote by J. Hudson Taylor.

"I used to ask God to help me.  Then I asked if I might help Him. 

I ended up by asking Him to do His work through me."



Rainbow Sprinkles!

Adventure: an unusual and exciting activity or experience

What does the word adventure mean to you?  Does it mean climbing Mt. Everest? Maybe it means striving to get on the Olympic Swimming Team for you.  Or could it be exploring inactive Lava Tubes in Hawaii?  Perhaps these are way out of you comfort zone and your idea of adventure could be going trail riding on your horse or exploring in an old forest.  What about riding in a horse drawn sleigh at Christmas time or learning to fly a helicopter?  Could it be trying new recipes or learning a new game?  Maybe it's going on a mission trip to the next state over from you or going overseas? What do you consider an adventure to be?  Do you make every day life an adventure or do you wait for that once-in-a-life-time-adventure to come along and that is it?



http://www.flickr.com/photos/never_house/7723841642/sizes/m/in/photostream/
by Never House

 As I thought about what adventure means to me some of the things listed above came to mind.  I enjoy canoeing or kayaking in new lakes and rivers, visiting waterfalls and the ocean. Someday I hope to visit Great Britain and see the castles, tea shops, country towns, busy seaside ports and so many other places that I've only ever read about.  I can honestly say that in the past few years my devotions have become a sort of adventure - digging into God's Word and seeking out treasures that He has for me each day.  Reading devotional books and finding special nuggets that inspire me to live a life set on fire for Christ.

However, as I ruminated on what I do for "adventures" to brighten up or spice up my day I was only drawing up blanks.  What do I do that brings some excitement into my day.  After thinking about it over night and still not coming up with anything, I realized it was time to talk to Mom.  She knows me better than anyone and sometimes helps me to see what I can not see even if it is right in front of my nose :}



http://www.flickr.com/photos/missmeng/7722312018/
by missmeng



So...we talked and she asked me what I enjoyed doing and try to do almost everyday....I realized that I try to spread "rainbow sprinkles" into at least one persons life everyday.  You're probably wondering what "rainbow sprinkles" are.  It is a term coined be Leslie Ludy when she saw her son ask for rainbow sprinkles on his ice cream.  She saw a parallel between the bright colored and beautiful sprinkles on her sons ice cream and the beautiful blessings that God sprinkles into our lives everyday. 

For those of us who have accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as our personal Savior and been born again, earth is not our home, but rather a place that we are journeying through.  Living with Christ in heaven is our destination and earth is our training ground for things to come.  Life is an adventure!  Finding ways to "sprinkle blessings" or bring "rainbow sprinkles" into people's lives is exciting and adventurous.  It's almost like being on a quest for joy.  Looking for ways to bring joy into other people lives.

Some examples of "rainbow sprinkles" could be:

* Emailing a friend an e-card

* Sending a friend a handwritten note

* Writing my family little notes to let them know how much I love them

* Making my parent's or sister's beds

* Doing someone else's chores :)

* Buying a little gift for someone

* Sending someone flowers or picking some of our own if they're are in season

* Sending postcards

* Giving a hug when they are not expected

* Baking some treats for others to enjoy

* Putting something special in a lunchbox

* One year I wrote to each of my parents and my sister one note each day from February 1st through the 14th, telling them why I loved them.

* ....and there are so many other things to do.  It's an adventure to find what makes different people smile and laugh.

What do you do to bring adventure into your life? 

Wherever the Cross Takes Me...

This is Altogether Separate's fortieth post. Forty is an interesting number. It rained over all the earth for forty days and nights. God led the Israelites through the wilderness forty years.  Jesus was on the mountain forty days and nights, tempted by Satan. A child is in the womb forty weeks...

But I digress.

Now, on to our regularly scheduled post.

As children, my friends' future careers changed on almost a weekly basis. Most of them still have no idea what they're ultimately going to do with their lives, and they rub their temples as they choose a major and pray for God's guidance on the road ahead.

I was always the odd one. I career-swapped a number of times in my early school days (though always pursuing similar fields), but well before middle school my love of animals and fascination with science fused into a steadfast pursuit of veterinary medicine.

My interest and utter enthusiasm in that area never waned (and if you find yourself particularly bored today or taking a curious fascination to strangers' childhoods you can read an essay about my peculiar and nerdy one), but as I grew older I began to wonder if doctoring animals was really what God wanted me to do with my life. After all, shouldn't I dedicate my blink-of-an-eye time on earth to serving people? Was this a God-given desire, or one to test me to see how much I was willing to sacrifice to follow Him?

It was during that time I learned of veterinary missionaries—veterinarians who abandon the comfort of their former lives to practice in less fortunate regions of the world, caring for the animals the native people rely upon for food, transportation, and income; educating them to increase the longevity of their livestock and equipping local veterinarians; and often ministering to the people in more conventional ways by distributing Bibles and helping churches and teaching English.

I came to realize there are at least as many ways to serve God as there are people to serve Him, and it was entirely possible I could serve through the veterinary field. Regardless of where life took me—overseas or here at home—I would be shining the Light He put in me by enabling me to live a holy life, and I would be fulfilling a necessary occupation in the world.

And what if this isn't what God wants? What if He wants me to marry and have children instead?

I suspect there is a good chance I am called to serve as a single woman (although honestly at this point I have no idea), but if I am to serve God by serving a husband, I will gladly devote my life to ministering to him and educating my children. If the latter, the knowledge and skills acquired in my time of singleness will probably help me in the future in ways I can't conceive of.

But the important thing is that I am content with God's plan, and I will carry my cross and follow Him wherever He may lead.

[By the way, I'm pretty sure I got all the facts right in the first paragraph, but I have the horrible habit of second-guessing myself and I don't have the time to double-check right now. So if I got anything wrong please let me know. =P]

Image credit GabrielaP93 on Flickr.

Top 5 Advantages to Homeschooling

As homeschoolers, we have some amazing opportunities that kids in the traditional school system can only dream of. Here are the main five I've noticed in my life. I have had a pretty lenient school schedule—I probably classify as an unschooler—so maybe some things are unique to my style of education.

1. Freedom in Education

For me, education isn't a chore that must be completed before 3pm before I can have any free time. Learning is a lifestyle.

I was never forced to write essays or create models, so I didn't dread compiling books on equine psychology or drawing maps of the migration paths of Australian parrots—entirely on my own terms. I didn't waste time answering every question in the curriculum when I thoroughly understood the material—in fact, I never took an English course. Once I got the basics down, my history lessons came from whatever books and websites and field trips I could get my hands on, allowing me to corroborate the facts from various sources rather than taking one viewpoint's word for it. I adored science and supplemented my usual curriculum with the latest in the journals.

Plato said, "All learning which is acquired under compulsion has no hold upon the mind." Because I wasn't taught under compulsion, the knowledge I've gained has taken firm root and my mind blossoms with passion for learning.

2. Lessons in Self-Discipline and Time Management

Did I ever take advantage of my freedom and shrink away to less constructive pastimes when I should have been doing something educational? Yes. I learned my lesson, and it's a much better lesson to learn at this stage in life than later on, when it really matters.

I had the opportunity to learn essential life lessons like self-discipline and managing time and putting priorities in order the hard way before failing a college class or getting fired from my day-job. My experiences will give me discretion in the years ahead, when I won't have my parents around to ensure I complete assignments on time.

3. Free Time

Unless I put a time-consuming task upon myself there's really nothing to hinder me from pursuits that don't fall under core classes, like classical piano and drama and sewing and horse training and novel- and screenwriting. I can take an hour or two to practice that Bach piece or rehearse lines for a play, or spend the afternoon teaching my horse to play fetch, or dedicate the month of November to the National Novel Writing Month. Or just read. Or write this very post.

Each of these things could potentially lead to a career (well, maybe not writing this post), so they're important skills to develop.

4. Making Friends

Some people find it mind-boggling that homeschoolers actually make friends. (Really, if most kids don't make friends outside of school, what kind of sad lives do they lead?) But one of the great advantages to homeschooling is that we get to meet people with similar interests, be it at band practice, soccer games, robotics competitions—you name it. And among homeschool groups, we're likely to meet people who share our values, adding an extra level of intimacy to our friendships.

The main issue that spurred this blog was how lonely we homeschooled girls often feel surrounded by the worldly people around us, but at least, as homeschoolers, we do have more opportunities to seek out people like us. Just last week I was able to attend a Christian writers' conference (thanks to not having a rigid school schedule holding me back). It was my third time going, and each year I've made friendships I believe will last a lifetime.

I might not get to see my friends every day (which is mostly because I live a weird life and my friends live far away--they see their other friends regularly), but I do have a number of wonderful, true friendships that run far deeper than those portrayed by the media.

And if we are blessed enough to have friends nearby, as I once did, we can spend time with them while our school-going peers are in class or doing homework. I cherish the many daytime hours I got to spend with my friends before I moved away.

5. Spending Time with Family

I have been asked, "Don't you hate being around your parents all day?" If this is the mindset, something is wrong. That's not to say I don't long at times to stretch my wings, but living at home has cultivated healthy relationships with my parents and a stronger bond than would probably have formed if I only saw my mother in the evenings and weekends. (Which is probably why I'm not as close with my father.) It can be hard at times to be at home so much, but I endeavor to be nothing but loving. If I can't do that with my own family, I can't do that with anyone else.

I was an only child before my brother was born year before last, so I'm thankful I'm able to spend as much time experiencing sisterhood as possible before I go away.


Homeschooling has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. I thank God daily for the opportunity to have such an education and for an unquenchable love of learning.

What great opportunities did you have through homeschooling that you couldn't have had otherwise?

Photo courtesy mikebaird on Flickr

Don't Dream. Do.

Image credit BaronBrian on Flickr

I don't know about you, but the coming of the new year is usually a sad time for me. As others discuss the year that has gone and all the things they did and the wonderful memories they made, I realize just how little I've done with the precious gift of life given to me.
The thing is, when people talk about living life to the fullest, they often mean physical feats; skydiving, perhaps, pocketing money to travel Europe, or embarking on a new business venture.

That's all well and good, but it isn't exactly practical or possible for some of us to do those things. I'm just a lowly highschooler! My parents don't have the money for a big trip, or anything so exciting, so what can I do but sit around and wait till I'm old enough to do something with my life?

By the time 2011 came around, I'd had enough of it. Maybe I couldn't visit London. Maybe I couldn't go to Harvard. Maybe I had a chronic illness that prevented me from doing things. Maybe I couldn't serve God the way I wanted to, by leaving all my earthly possessions behind and suffering the harsh winters of Mongolia as a missionary.

But I could--and always can--serve God the way He wants me to.

So in 2011, I pushed myself to the limit making the most of my precious little time on earth. I read the Bible cover-to-cover. I spent many sweet hours in prayer for the afflicted, the oppressed, and the lost. I devoted myself more than ever to my studies and attacked math problems with vigor (although not with a paper shredder, as I would have liked to).

But the most important things I did were not physical actions. They were matters of the heart. I severed my attachment to the material things of this world. I let go of the past. I presented my troubles to God. I realized that my present trials serve not to hinder but to prepare me for my future by instilling the qualities--the perseverance, the patience, the trust, the empathy--that I will need later in life. I submitted, even in the midst of agony, to whatever may be in God's will.

And in things like these, I took up my cross and followed Him.

The biggest things in life are often the simplest. So even if you aren't yet in a position to work your dream job, or to become a mother and raise children, or whatever your passion may be, remember that each passing moment is an opportunity to ready yourself for the future--either spiritually, mentally, or physically. And the longer you have to wait, the more prepared you will be--if you take advantage of your time to prepare.

No matter how impossible that passion of yours seems, either financially or physically or otherwise, if God wants it to, it will happen. No matter how far-fetched it sounds that I could serve in Mongolia in my current condition, if that's what He tells me He wants, He will give me the strength to serve. And if that's not what He wants? He must have something even better planned.

Life is an occupation of unknown duration. Don't waste it dreaming. Live it doing.